If you have a favorite local watering hole - you need a favorite bar patron to go with it! Making friends at a bar might not be for everyone, but if you're a cocktail connoisseur or nightlife lover, this could be the perfect friend to make as an adult! Bar friends are the most accessible, realistic friends you can make post-college because the effort is low, and the vibes are chill. It's someone you can see frequently without committing your schedule to hanging out. Instead, you run into them every night or week at the bar, catch up, enjoy each other's company over a few drinks, and call it a night. It's a simple friendship that's historically been an adult platonic must-have companion, given that so many of us love socializing at a bar near our home.
What Are Bar Friends?
Bar friends are the friends you make every night at the bar on your street corner while watching your local sports channel and enjoying happy hour. A bar friend could be made while applying lipstick in a gross dive bar bathroom who told you not to text your ex. A bar friend could be a friend you make while singing drunk karaoke at 2 am when you promised to leave by 10. Whatever the situation, it's a friend made at a pub in your town where you can blow off steam and let your walls down after a long AF day at work.
Should You Make A Bar Friend?
Bar friends are a unique breed. They love alcohol and always know the perfect song to play on TouchTunes. Making a bar friend isn't for everyone. Some of us like to be anonymous at the bar, grab a quick drink and mindlessly scroll our phones. At the same time, others love being social and seeing returning faces while talking to their favorite bartenders. Before deciding if you should attempt to make a bar friend, determine what type of bar-goer you are. If you prefer your bar time to be spent unwinding and leaving behind the day's problems, there might be better options than adding a friend to your nightly/weekly routine. If you enjoy sitting at the bar and having a great conversation, this category could lead to best friend potential.
Bar Friend Benefits?
Making friends at your local fav can be super beneficial, particularly if you have a busy work life and need your social life to revolve around a convenient space. Reoccurring bar patrons usually tend to live in close vicinity to that location. They also have something in common with the bar's theme - such as a sports team, type of music, or aesthetic. The friends you make at a dive bar will likely be a completely different personality than those you make at a five-star bar downtown. You can learn much about people based on the bars they frequent and their go-to drink order.
Bar friends can be incredibly chill friends to have, given that they don't know you outside of the bar, and your work/daily life doesn't have to be discussed if you don't want to share. You can be anyone you want! & so can they! It's important to be safe and establish boundaries if you plan to make a bar friend. Stranger danger and all that... you also want to consider your limitations (if any) with alcohol. If you can't or don't want to drink often, this friend group could lead to a toxic dynamic.
The Downside & What To Watch Out For With This Friend Type:
These friendships are often born out of the night’s wild energy, fueled by alcohol, and built on fleeting moments. When the booze wears off, so does the vibe. What seemed like a strong connection over shots and bad dance moves can quickly turn into awkward small talk the next time you run into each other sober. Plus, the bar scene is full of drama—hookups, jealousy, or just people acting a mess can lead to unnecessary tension, especially when egos clash or someone’s trying to be the life of the party every time. If one of you starts partying too hard or acting recklessly, it can turn into a fallout that ruins the fun for everyone.
How To Make Bar Friends:
Finding a favorite local bar is crucial to making a bar friend. You want to find a space with a menu that fits your food/drink desires and budget. It's also essential that you like the vibe and bartenders. This bar could be you and your new friend's "Spot" so make it a place you enjoy hanging out.
Most bar patrons are a few drinks in - meaning they'll be in the mood to socialize, and you'll find that striking-up conversation flows (like the drinks!) quickly. Asking a potential friend for a drink recommendation or if they're attending X event at the bar (like karaoke or open mic night) is a quick way to see if they're someone you could be friends with.
Rating Bar Friends
Connection Ease:
████████ 8/10 - Easy! Many people go to bars to socialize & hang out!
Shared Interests:
████ 4/10 - Outside of location & ambiance vibes, you might not have much in common
Sober?! Here's Tips To Enjoy The Bar Setting Sans Alcohol:
-Order fun mocktails or NA beers, such as Athletic Brewing or Heineken 0.0
-Never underestimate what a good coke & lime can do for you!
-If you're invited to partake in shots, ask for a shot of pickle juice - allows you to "toast" AND make the same cringe face
-Set boundaries and don't engage with friends/potential friends who do not respect your sobriety
-Offer to be the designated driver: Many bars let DD's drink or eat for free! Plus, it helps promote sobriety and ensures a safe ride for friends
-Bring games or activities to the bar - like Cards Against Humanity
-Attend bars only on live music, karaoke, or trivia nights so there is an activity to partake in besides drinking
Continue The Bar Friend Conversation:
Check out Season 1, Episode 2 "Bar Friends" on our podcast! Available on Spotify & major streaming platforms! You can also view this episode through our website or on Youtube.
Have a bar friend story to share?! We would love to hear it! Leave us a comment or message us at hardtomakefriends@gmail.com
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